Traveling with a Toddler: Tips for Keeping Calm and Enjoying the Ride

Close your eyes and imagine you are on a scenic, winding road; surrounded by canopies of trees and foliage, the blue mountains lining your vision through the windshield, your favorite music in the background setting a perfect scene for a roadtrip. Your serenity is suddenly shattered by the wails of a restless toddler in the backset, shrieking because they dropped their favorite plastic train as they kick the back of your seat. The crisp mountain air is clouded by a mystery odor (was that a dead animal or a dirty diaper? Or even worse...vomit...) and as you frantically pour through your disheveled diaper bag, you realize you have only a small baggie of crushed Goldfish crumbs to offer your frustrated little one. You fumble with the radio dial in desperate hopes of finding an uplifting tune, only to be rebuffed by the lack of signal deep in the mountains. You, my friend, are trapped in the Murphy's Law tornado where everything that can go wrong, will.
So as parents, helpless to the onset of Murphy's Law halfway through our roadtrip, what do we do to prevent this downward spiral? This weekend, I did the unthinkable--I braved a 7.5 hour roadtrip to Connecticut on a Friday afternoon after work, during summer rush hour traffic, through the mountains with only myself and a 2.5 year old who detests long car rides.
From the get-go, it seemed that things were just not going to go my way. Despite purchasing a head-rest DVD player, countless activity books and a plethora of convenient snacks far in advance, discouraging obstacles started rearing their ugly heads the week before our voyage. For starters, my trusty Prius failed its' inspection and needed 4 new tires and some cap thing-a-majiggy to pass. They had to order the part so the inspection and release of my vehicle occured the night before the trip. As I scrambled to pack my car in the dark, I felt relieved that I had so carefully and obsessively planned out every other detail of the trip, thinking it would fall into place. The next morning, after an exhausting work mission that entailed 4+ hours of driving, I set up the DVD player, activity box, and snack tray for Rylan. When I went to turn on the DVD player, I was dismayed to realize that it only worked while plugged into a charging port. I pulled out the car charger that it came with and saw that the plug was severed and frayed (worst business ever!)...thus commencing the 1.5 hour scavenger hunt to find a store that carried an inverter to go into the car lighter. The day was saved by my saint of a mother who managed to find one at AutoZone.

We started our voyage and the views were absolutely breathtaking through the mountains. My son slept through the first portion, then we played a game of "I spy the biggest mountain." Everything was smooth sailing and I thought to myself, "hey, this isn't so bad!" We stopped for penny candy at a general store near Port Jervis, munched on sub sandwiches in Poughkeepsie, and the high-pitched voice of Caillou playing on a loop in the backseat kept him content for the most part. That's when the rush hour traffic hit. Every few miles, the GPS would say to me "13 minute slow-down,"..."24 minute slow-down,"..."Your travel has been delayed by 1 hour 32 minutes." I played my own game in my head titled "How many strings of exploitives can I think up?" It was so discouraging and I felt myself starting to get frustrated and antsy, thinking that my toddler was going to start losing it. Praise the heavens because he never whined once, and was appreciative of the steady stream of toys that I handed him while we sat at a standstill.


So, here's what I learned:

1. PLAN PLAN PLAN. Shell out the $60 for the headrest DVD player. Collect every kids' movie you've ever owned in your life and have it within arms reach. Stock up on an assortment of snacks that can be easily accessed and opened that won't end up smeared all over the back of the passenger seat. Strategically place diapers and wipes throughout the car so you can change a diaper anywhere when you stop for a break or wipe sticky fingers. Don't forget about the value of having stickers and activity books on hand. And magnadoodles.
2. Don't get discouraged when everything that you so carefully constructed starts slipping through your fingers. Things will go haywire and you WILL inevitably get stuck in traffic. You are in control and you will make it to your destination. Keep an open mind and learn to laugh it off (instead of being a frazzled curmudgeon like I was at the beginning and end of the car ride).
3. Entertain your kids to the best of your ability. Play "I Spy","Count the Cows" or "21 Questions." Put on energetic music that you can all sing along to. Tell stories together and let them get creative with their imagination. A DVD will only entertain them for so long--this is your opportunity to make memories. I didn't think Rylan would be responsive yet to road trip games, but he had the time of his life!
4. Pit-Stops can be the coolest part of your journey! Research popular places to chart along the way and give yourself ample time to enjoy them. On the way back from Connecticut, we stopped in the charming town of Milford, PA and ate a leisurely lunch at a downtown deli, followed by a short jaunt through town to browse a whirligig shoppe. It helped to break up the monotony of a long drive and re-energized both of us. If you are too tired to finish the journey that day, be the hero by getting a hotel or campsite to sleep in.
5. You are Super Parent. You are an absolute Rock Star for doing the unthinkable and taking your little one on a memorable vacation. Will everything go according to plan? Probably not. But despite the sticky fingers, the poopy carseats, the restless passengers, these are the best moments of your life to share with your family. And keep telling yourself that EVERY parent in EVERY corner of this country has dealt with the same scenario--there is no flawless roadtrip ever reported in history.